50/50 x All Good Things

50/50 [2011]

When awful things happen, we'll try to keep calm and fill our brains with positive feelings that everything is going to be fine. But we're just denying it all. Sooner the anger comes out and we start questioning, why me? why do I get this such big problems in my life? What did I do wrong? I'm sorry God, but why me? I've been good, I stayed out of drugs, I didn't even smoke, I love my parents, but why? why?

This is what happened to JGL in the movie. I'll be just the same if I were him. He was actually pretty tough, calm, patience enough going through this rough situation between cancer and breaking up with his cheating gf. He didn't need anyone to feel sorry about him bcs he was confident, he could take care of himself. Eventually at some point, this won't last long, he felt angry of himself he wanted to run so far away from the world, leaving it all behind, he wanted to get out of reality, reality that gave him hard times and sickness. He wanted to get away.

When he's too tired to run, tired being mad, he stopped and all he needed was a shoulder to cry on and warm hugs of people that he loved much. He had it all, he was happy that everyone sticks with him at his worst. That's all he needed.

All Good Things [2010]

Ryan Gosling had never been this creepy, he was troubled, traumatized when he was young. He saw his frustrated mother jumping off from his 5 stories house that affected his behavior being an adult.

He married Kirsten, He was so in love, he dominated the whole reationship that caused the death of his wife on his own hands. It's tragic.

Too much love kills, man. I'm serious. When you feel this way, it's hard to get out, but just try to let loose a bit, make yourself busy with your jobs or hobbies. That'll help a little.

bugs

We've finally launched the event, it was a small, simple kind of event, but yeah everything had gone smoothly. It wasn't going exactly according to plan, there was some financial stuffs going on and all of us gave some cash to overcame it.

I realize I made a huge mistake, I still feel raw about it. I shouldn't take much charge on it's technical stuffs. Irwan told me I did most of things but Aan did the right thing to do. I was pissed off by it. Then I thought, he's right. I should be the one who 'implant' my ideas and thoughts to the committee, and let them do the rest, whatever it will be. Anyway, my college isn't based from art, it's an accounting college, more precisely, it's a college concentrating on government bureaucracy. I should have been aware of that.

Conclusively, I really have to start thinking first, counting about the risks before I do things.

Pringgandana

It is called Pringgandana. I did not really have that urge to watch this kinda thing, but Rizka and Enes were performers in there so as a good friend I totally got to watch them dance. Also this event sorta reminds me of Recital Choir which I also performed there singing in front of so many people for the first time, I was excited yet nervous. Mostly nervous actually, I got panic, my hands were trembling, I tried to be as cool as possible but it did not work really well, I forgot some of it's lyric, anyway I sang Dancing Queen by ABBA, took sopran notes, but yeah I finished them anyway. I took lesson for this to keep reminding myself that it's nothing to lose, at least I wasn't that bad, and the most important thing is I gain some new experiences. Still a legit good thing ;)

midnight city

Am so in love with this song, been stucked on replay, Midnight City by M83.

 

dia.lo.gue

So, I was there at Dia.Lo.Gue artspace at Kemang with my fellow designer mates, Ekki, Anis and one new fellow, Vindy. Well, Vindy had been internshipping at art & culture dept at BEM STAN. We had inteded to go there, but we never made it, things always came up to stand in our way, but yeah we're finally made it anyway.

To be honest a hundred percently, that day would never go out of my head, cause THE PLACE WAS SUPER AWESOME, indeed. Everything in there, the tables, installations, artworks, paintings, crafts, even the lights was assembled and fit perfectly.While the foods, only Anis had them, a spaghetti bolognaise and it tasted just fine. Vindy and I ordered Avocado oreo which tasted pretty good actually, while Ekki decided to order Iced Latte which was kind of bitter so I asked him whether he wanted to add sum sweetener that I got myself. Haha I always kinda aware about sugar so I bring my own sweetener, ya know... diet stuff.

Anyway, back to da topic, while we were having our brunch there, I spotted sum magazines near the window. I took some and they were great as it titled 'Elephant Magazine'. You can see sum of it's content here.

ludah basi

On Sunday, last week, I watched a theatrical act called Ludah Basi at Taman Ismail Marzuki, with my fellow Art and Culture Dept of BEM in STAN. We went there with few people from Teater Alir (an internal organization of STAN students which has the same interest on Theatrical thingy). Surprisingly, it was good, cause I was a little doubty. Most people don't really like watching a theatre cause it'll be really boring. Well I got to say, that's a wrong statement, it turned out to be such an exciting experience I got from the play. The casts (from Salihara theatre) went all crazy and shameless, but that's actually a good thing, cause being great in this kinda industry, requires a very high confidence, ryte? And also, the script, the set was really good actually. So far, it was the best play I've ever seen.

april drool

Oh how I wish I can buy one of em, they're not so pricey, and also strong and super comfy, but I'm willing to buy Tamron 17-50mm f/2.8 VC XR Di II LD Aspherical IF so badly, guess I've to hold you shoesy baby, hang in there :(

Festival Budaya Nusantara

To explain what was happened in the past two weeks, there's only one word to describe: EXHAUSTION. Like, really, it's the best theme of this post, frankly to say. So many things happened, real fast, summarized into two weeks only.

First highlight would be, Animaku No Hibi: Fuuto No Kaze on the last March weekend. It was pretty crowdy, with so many geeks and freaks (no offense yes? :p) who loved Japanese thingy much. There were Japs food tooo like, dorayaki, sushi, oden, ramen and of course takoyakis! They tasted heavenly, I'd 10 of em, it ruined my diet so much :( And also Obake Yashiki, Japanese horror vaganza, to be honest I got shocked several times in there, no wonder I hate haunted house very much. I did not watch all performances such as bon odori, and fireworks, I was too exhausted I decided to go home and take a shower. Ekki, my closest friend here, who was also a head conceptor for Maharema, submission for Festival Budaya Nusantara (I'll tell you about this later), asked me to help him paint the exhibition decors. There there the most exhausting feeling ever would be that day.

Too bad no photographs I can exhibit here cause I used my pap's old cammie with me when I was at Animaku. I was too damn fucking lazy to use my dslr. The lens was broken pretty bad, so I decided to use the analog instead of dslr. The biggest problem here is that I couldn't find any place around Bintaro or Southern Jakarta to digitalize this film roll.

Anyway, on Monday, Mum was in Jakarta for somekind of govie thingy test, idk what was it. She asked me to meet her in Kartika Chandra Hotel and had lunch at Plaza Semanggi. It was a quick visit cause I had a class in the morning. Sigh. Nevertheless, it's always a happy thing to see your relative even if it's only for a second, right? :)

While the first weekend on April, let's call it April Fools Day, at 5 in the morning, I did make-up job for Izza, Putri Nusantara representing Maharema (regional organization which included students in STAN from  Malang ). I spent like almost 2 hours for the make up only. Took long enough time cause I went crazy and perfectionist, something just crashed me and told me so hahahaha jk.

At about noon I finally went to Festival Budaya Nusantara in STAN. It  was an annual event, held by my department on BEM, art and culture department. It started at 9 am, there were cultural exhibitions from all over regions, Java, Sumatra, Kalimantan, Sulawesi etc. Helll, I was overjoyed that I ate every bits of every region's typical culinary such as mendoan from purwokerto, bakso bakar from malang, everything. But at about 3 pm, sadly downpour came out and kind of ruined the event. To kill le boredness of the rain, I decided to stroll down to Lawson and Gramedia, spent about 5 hours there just to wait for the rainy wainy. The rain stopped after 6 pm and by the end of the night, Barry Likumahuwa Project performed which I thought it was great but to be honest, a bit boring cause I did not have any chance to hear their songs first. Same thing happened to Anis so we'd better go home and sleep, cause we both had class in the next morning. Double sighs!

Oh yesss, one more thing I guess, stanartfestival posters, flyers and banners were finally printed! Yeay, too much rainbow I puked from my stomach. I was really happy and grateful between all these busy thingy activities, hopefully, this will go over and over till I die. amen.

He is Mamet, one of my closest friend in STAN, taking pic with the poster. Check his instagram here.

darwin deez

5 days from Sunday, I haven't gone jogging arrrrgh this is frustrating me a lot. I've been busy and lazy all the time. But, strangely I've started  drawing a lot continously until now. Weird, I wonder where did that wind come from. Later I'll post some of my drawings. Now, I'll leave you out with a piece of DARWIN DEEZ that I've been overhypeing over and over again, can't stand the repeat button on my media player. Sick yes!

 

first second

Hello, it's been awhile, well not that awhile actually it's been like FOREVER since the last time I post things here. So now, I'm making myself up, at least I'll post once a week :)

What has happened to me all these times are quite much. It's pretty hard to explain one by one, I don't know where to start so, I'll start from this week and tell everything that happened to me little by little.

It's been a hectic week for me, I had to wake up at 5 in the morning and jog at 5.50 for 40 minutes, because I'm willing to lose some weight. You see, first time I got here I was skinnier, I weigh about 7 kilos less than my weight now :( So saaad, when you know that you can't eat anything and stay the same shape like my skinny friends here. Anyway, no probs to me at all. This diet I'm  having now is quite moderately okay and not torturing at all. I'm now eating good foods with lower carbs, higher proteins, vitamins and minerals. No junk food, no more instant noodles, more eating frequencies with snacks such as fruits like oranges, bananas, tomatoes. Healthy enough, eh?
And also, once in every weekend, Kiseno and I will go swimming. It's been a week and the results are really unbelievable. I feel lighter, and impressively get more active. I prefer wash and iron my own clothes, clean my room more frequently, and till now you see I'm here updating my oh-so-old-abandoned blog.
Srsly, cardio every morning, swimming every weekend, eating healthier foods are the highlights of this week, second week of March. *claphands backsound*

The last thing I guess, I'll tell about my project as a designer of STAN ART FESTIVAL that will hold on May 26th this year. I've been designing some teaser posters, proposal, and making it's websites better as you can see the blog here and tumblr here.